A lot of people believe, first, that disability is always a problem with disabled people, and never in any way a oroblem with ableist society.
A lot of people believe, second, that if we just put our minds to it, we can overcome anything.
And that extends to holding that, first, it’s our responsibility to accommodate ourselves to all the accessibility barriers they pretend don’t exist, and all the violence they pretend doesn’t occur, and also, to all the slurs.
According to the New York Times and the Harriet Tubman Collective, 60% to 80% of the people killed by police were disabled:http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/02/us/police-shootings-of-mentally-ill-suspects-are-on-the-upswing.html?_r=1http://harriettubmancollective.tumblr.com/post/150072319030/htcvision4blacklives
And that's the tip of the iceberg of ableist policy.
Now, I have sensory processing issues. I can’t accommodate myself to backup beepers or strobe lights. I got very badly strobed before dawn on thursday, and was still in pain and vomiting saturday. I might be able to work on my balance to accommodate myself to the occasional car horn or turn signal, but still not to the busy intersections they expect me to cross at. If I’m hit by flashing lights, I will be blinded by them, and if I’m hit by flashing lights from several directions, I will lose my balance - and sometimes stumble into the street.
So if I’m going to function or even survive, other people have to stop hitting me so often.
I am at their mercy. And if they decide that ableism is a-okay, and that beating people up is a-okay, I am not okay; I will probably still be beaten again and again, and hit by cars once or twice or three times more, and eventually killed.
So that’s why the slurs hurt so much.